On the English literacy racket: Language centers that teach English as a foreign language in Egypt have become a cesspool. Take this shyster who runs a center called Not Courses, which claims to teach students how to speak English in an American accent. In this ludicrous ad (watch; runtime: 2:59), he slaps his student to get him to pronounce a word which after first five views of sounding like an odd mix of gurgling and gagging turned out to be “slap.” This is either a throwback to the Egyptian public education system, or the only way for the guy to teach a student a word he can’t pronounce is physical violence. After the video went viral, it was given its due ridicule by voice actor Marwan Younis (watch; runtime: 8:38). And it’s not just accents. A closer look at this venerable institution’s Facebook page reveals a rudimentary grasp of the English language. We hope this doesn’t discourage honest proprietors who know what they are doing from setting up shop so travesties like this (watch; runtime: 0:40) don’t pollute our airwaves again.